House of Mind

I wanted to cry, but you are in a better place than what earth can afford you ~ pained heart

Mma is an African name for mother, I used that to call my grandmother because I grew up with my aunts and uncles and they would always utter that, to differentiate between the two I would call my mother Mama, which is another African language word for mother.

Mma passed away after a 3-decade battle with sugar diabetes, her healthy deteriorated drastically after her Doctor, my aunt passed away. My aunt was a nurse but to my grandma, she was her doctor because she kept her well for the longest time, now I get to think about it, how did she do it? cause the things she would do were fundamental and out there, like taking meds and eating healthy. I feel there was a more vital force between the two and that my grandma passed on because of the broken bond, talk about Broken Heart Syndrome.

Mma was a full-house person, she had all the features anyone could think of, right outside the box she did everything for us, from raising us and installing good ethics with good manners to complement them to hustling for us as a tycoon businesswoman with a variety of small businesses ranging from mini tuck shop at school, knitting cloths, selling floor polish before tiles were a thing, selling chicken anatomy(chicken feet, intestine, and heads) as the staple food for the township community and cool drinks. She had a brilliant mind for local business and understood her market very well. My grandma is from farming and domestic work experience wise, but she possessed the wisdom of a business tycoon, we always wondered if she went to school, where would her business ambition be today.

A Ndebele woman with multiple talents, my grandma also used to do Ndebele patterns patting like Ester Mahlangu, but got stopped by my grandfather to focus her energy somewhere else as he didn’t see how would it profit us back then. Another thing my grandma enjoyed is knitting, she used to do a lot of knitting of hats, gloves, and other things until she stopped cause her hand was giving her issues, think knitting people know this issue, but a few years back during covid, her knitting love was rekindled when my wife showed her some of the knittings she has been doing during covid and it sparked a fire after my wife left her with some wool and needle, from there on we got her more wools as she was knitting something and unknitting to do something else as she had no wool to play with, her last work was covers for her sofas.

I had an ultimate subscription to my grandma during my childhood and grew up in her house till I left after varsity, oh boy it’s not all sweets grandparents will spoil you as the grandchild affair, that works when you are a visiting grandchild. Other than my shenanigans, one thing I remember is that my grandma had an elephant memory, my mom used to come by once a month as she was working very far, and she would visit for two days during the weekend most of the time, the first day/night would be a happy day with gifts and everything, come the morning my grandma would give my shenanigans in bullet point to my mother and would get double jeopardy beaten(with a belt or fence tree), cause when I did them I also got a beating and a note from her that she will also tell my mother and they surely did when she came by, I did not know the law of double jeopardy back then, could have raised it with them, but been an African child, it doesn’t apply, guess you get the double discipline benefit.

I was a child full time with my grandparents, my grandma made sure of it, I never had to worry or sleep hungry, but on numerous occasions would switch to a vegetarian lifestyle and see meat weekend, ha ha. My grandparents took school very seriously and everything that stands in your way and school they would do everything in their power to remove it. As am typing this am in my bed in my cold house, but at Gandma’s house everything is central to the coal stove, especially in winter, we were always warm and in the kitchen, eating, doing homework, and just being family, during power outages we would not worry about tomorrow, in fact, we were looking forward to making it as an excuse to not go to school, but you would wake up with hot water ready(prepared early by grandma using paraffin stove) for you to bath and go to school. During school projects we used to get their extraordinary help, even with science projects, I remember my grandma enjoyed the seed germination project, cause she had a garden and experience during her farming times, and also arts and culture projects to showcase our culture.

A tribute to my grandma :

Not all heroes wear capes, but my grandma wore her duku diligently like a cape, at 1st site of our in-laws, she would rush to save the day and present them with some cool drink and tea for the relatives, she took it a step further and took my NY(New York) hip hop cap, with her duku under, looking like a durant and went to mochainna with it, after that I lost street credits, can’t blame her, it was a hot day.

4:30 pm was every kid’s favorite time during the Era of Dragon Ball Z, but my grandma found a way to generate money during that time at the expense of my fun time by sending me to mochainna, every single day of the week, I could only watch the recap, thanks to that I am good at making up stories or just watch the trailer of the movie and am set. Going to mochainna at least I got the weekends off like a proper worker, she would be on my aunt’s case to clean during the weekend like proper African parents, while listening to some Lundi, Helngiwe Mhlaba and Deborah Fraser gospel at its golden time.

A chef ahead of her time, my grand produced a classic dish only found in top restaurants, one day she cooked chicken with cinnamon, and we all thought it was a mistake, only years later when we could afford these high places we found the dish. At heart she was a business tycoon for our sustainability, she sold floor polish, chicken anatomy (malana, maotwana and ditlhogana), and coke drink, which got nurses from the clinic coming back for more.

Heaven has gained a manager for abundance, cause on earth she gave to all and was charitable to everyone, visitors will miss that mudende hamper from my grandma of the big pink soap
bar and vaslap that loses color with each wash to remind you to change it, clever grandma, your wisdom will forever be between my ears.

This song comes to mind when I remember her, I will forever be grateful and will try to pass her teaching all over.

To the Pastor’s wife that she was, grateful for her prayers during my childhood and now, will continue and pray for others to be saved by our Lord and Saviour.

We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors; we borrow it from our children.

My child, am borrowing the resource of the world for my grandchild, your future child, its a risky transaction, but I hope I will be able to pay you back in abundance. Right now am looking into two places, that cause so much pain for me, but am hopeful you wont have to do, I will cover you by the sigh of my eyes as the eyes of my heart have done. The past I dwell too much on it, good memories and regrets of not knowing better in decisions made, it brings so much pain, but not as the future, as its unknown and scary when the past didn’t take shape to feed the future prosperously.

During the course of my youth and adulthood, I lack, what I try to find, I fear what I don’t know, all my hope lies with the world of the Lord that A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children, but the wealth of the sinner is stored up for the righteous, hence I borrow the raw resource of Earth to build what must stand the test of time.

The present, I have not known, its a place that has no pain, nor sorrow, for the rest of my repayment to you, you will be in the presence with me and I hope you will look only in my past to learn for your future and we will tackle your future together for a brighter one

Written as an interpretation of the profound African proverb and a life time hope of parents to their children’s future prospects.

I’m no good at goodbyes #Post-Malome, I find it very weird that humans have to say goodbye every day to each other if they are going to see each other again or communicate with each other later on. I recently joined a new company and had to say goodbye to my then colleagues, it’s hard saying goodbye to good people and a great company, reading through google you might find motivation and understanding stating that it’s all business and business is just business, don’t take it personally, hard pill to swallow, we all relational beings after all.

It’s easier to say goodbye to a bad experience in a company, than to a good one, someone asked a question at Quora, that how do you reject a counteroffer after resigning, even if you loved the company, the response was interesting, someone wrote that you ought to have thought of it before resigning, so technically you already dealt with the hard part deciding quite. Back to my story, I left for growth, which I felt I so much needed cause I was growing only horizontally I felt, but not vertically, it’s hard explaining that to team members who supported you and contributed to what you are today. So I sat down and wrote a piece of poem, but it’s technically a very short story, it felt better after that, hoping it will stick with them and let guilt trip not eat me up.

I recommend all people resigning to write a short story or email with a unique touch to the people they contributed to their journey and send them, cause everyone can say goodbye, but not everyone means it.

Hope you enjoy, caution, brutal grammar and inside references ahead.

AB Ship

A maverick, 5 core engines and multiple threads
Navigating through Fintech like a hot butter knife, cutting through unsalted butter
All rainbow teams coordinating to break through tides and leaving no area unexplored
The Green team letting in cooling effect through part of the ship via credit department
Oh hoy Purple team with captain Deepti spearing through tides fiercely with swift coding skills
While Vice Anji, taking 1 storm encounter at a time with the speed of thunder, Usain bolt fast
While Team purple members soldering on from behind with no cover at the back to get the job done
One man Team Dharma, “I am the only one who gets the job done, I don’t know anyone who can
cover for me”, Ebankit needed a bridge to come in on board, Dharma offered an escalator, nobody
knows how he does it.
Row forward the AB ship goes, meeting mist in uncharted territories, what’s that ahead?
An unknown request coming from North, May Day! Call captain Ebe from the Security department
“This is captain Ebe speaking unknown request source identified, my right-hand man, will take care”
Mr. Moosa, cooking bullets to neutralize the threat one commit at a time, gun loaded, fire!!!
We live to see another day, “Nothing from my side, Dynatrace all green 200 OK “.
Forward we go into the green pastures we seek, one Sonarqube story at a time
Message from Commander Khan, “Crew we are heading to an ice-berg, breaks can’t save us now”
Can someone call captain Madi of the mechanic’s team, we need to lose some weight to make a
sharp turn, it’s better than crushing the Iceberg.
“What’s up guys”, crunching API standards and ethics for the bank, “Hold on guys, this maneuver
Would set us 3 moons back”, as the open API standard is broken to loosen some weight for the sharp
turn, day saved another release is cooking in Jenkins and Gitlab pots, enough to feed Nock and
Midrand while adding to our technical dept.
Oh, it’s been rocky sail mates, please drop me at the next port, need to gain more stamina for the
next voyage.

“You guys will never see me leaving until something I coded breaks”
gammer4live